Category: Parenting Tips

Posts related to Parenting Tips

I was asked this question several years ago and it was a very powerful question for me so I wanted to share it with you.

Like you, I was already an engaged and connected parent; however, taking a few minutes to actually write down my vision for my kids enabled me to see areas where I was spending a lot of time and areas where I wanted to focus more.

Although we can’t guarantee how our kids will “turn out”

Dreams often get a bad rap – “Be realistic”, “Get your head out of the clouds”, “Live in the real world”…

The myth we often hear is that dreaming is irresponsible, unrealistic, and unreasonable.

But did you realize that our world is built on dreams!

Throughout history, humans have made the once “impossible”, possible – from electricity, to airplane flight, to cell phones, to open heart surgery – impossible [...]

I was asked this question several years ago and it was a very powerful question for me so I wanted to share it with you.

Like you, I was already an engaged and connected parent; however, taking a few minutes to actually write down my vision for my kids enabled me to see areas where I was spending a lot of time and areas where I wanted to focus more.

Although we can’t guarantee how our kids will “turn out”, every interaction we have with them does shape their lives – especially when they are young and their core thoughts and belief systems are being formed.

I would like to invite you to spend about 10 minutes today thinking about this question and creating a vision for your parenting if you don’t already have one.

As part of the exercise, you may want to use the “Balance Wheel”.  The Balance Wheel is a coaching tool [...]

Does Your Child Have Yo-Yo Self-Esteem?

Does your child’s self-esteem rise and fall with the grades she makes?

Does your child’s self-esteem rise and fall depending on who played with him at school that day?

Does your child’s self-esteem crumble if he makes a mistake?

If so, then your child is suffering from yo-yo self-esteem — self-esteem that rises and falls with the ups and downs of life.

How kids feel about themselves often depends on what is going on in their life – what is going on outside of them.

However, powerful self-esteem isn’t based on what is going on outside of you (what is happening in your life). Powerful self-esteem is based on what is going on inside of you — who you are and how you think about yourself.

When kids base their self-esteem on “who they are” then their self-esteem can remain intact no matter what is going on in their [...]

Children need to learn to obey, but not merely to make their parents’ lives easier. They learn obedience because it builds good character. Obedience isn’t just about getting tasks done. We teach obedience because hidden within this character quality are a number of principles that will help children to be successful in life.

When kids learn obedience, they learn to consider the needs of others. They learn to be a little less selfish. They learn to fit into the agenda of those around them. They learn to submit to authority. Children who learn to obey their parents are better prepared to obey God as they grow older.

Obedience involves learning to do what you’re told even when you think you have a better way or you’d rather do something else. The person who has learned obedience knows how to listen to an instruction, how to follow through without being watched, and how to report back [...]

Some children struggle with things externally, acting out, getting in trouble at school or with the law, and disobeying their parents. Through these actions they often learn valuable life lessons. It’s not the best way to learn, and the experiences they face are often unforgiving and painful.

Other children may conform to the rules outwardly, but inside they’re wrestling just as fervently—and significantly—as the outwardly rebellious child. They mull things over and make wishes and longings. The actions may look different, but the heart-struggle is the same.

The story of the prodigal son, found in Luke 15:11-32, illustrates this well. While the focus is on the rebellious younger brother in the parable, we get a glimpse into the internal struggles of the seemingly compliant older brother. Both brothers had heart problems. They just dealt with them in different ways.

Some parents spend a lot of energy trying to help the prodigal and not as much [...]

The Most Common Parenting Question of All

The question we’re probably asked the most often in our parenting seminars and radio interviews is, “What do I do when my kids act out in the grocery store?” We all have stories from our own families and we’ve observed other children throw tantrums, run away, whine, complain, or disobey in the store. We may write a booklet someday called, “How to Parent in Public.”  Then we could all carry around these booklets and hand them out to frustrated parents in public places.

At least part of the answer is that you don’t practice your discipline strategies in the grocery store. That’s the final exam! You practice in the kitchen, bedroom, laundry room, and backyard. Children need to learn how to handle disappointment at home so they can accept a no answer in the check out line. Our kids need to learn to come when they’re called so [...]

One of the greatest sources of sadness and discouragement for parents is watching their children fight. Teasing, bickering, arguing, and meanness wear heavily on a parent’s heart. Is sibling conflict inevitable? Yes and no. Sibling conflict is an opportunity. The family is a place where we learn and grow. Getting along with sinful people is never easy, and nowhere is it more difficult than in family life.

Sibling conflict is a child’s first class in relationship training. You are the teacher, your home is the classroom, and honor is the curriculum. Developing honor as a lifestyle in your family can turn relationships around. Honor is the solution to sibling conflict. In fact honor is the solution for all relationship struggles.

We believe that God has placed every person in a family for a reason. Sometimes a child is annoying or irritating. That’s a problem and that child needs to learn self-control and sensitivity to overcome [...]

It’s easy to focus on how far children need to go instead of how far they’ve come. One way to keep a positive focus in your discipline is to look for approximately right behavior and affirm it. Don’t wait until things are absolutely right.

If you ask your child to clean up the toys but find that he’s only put away two things and left six out, you might say, “Oh, I see you put the blocks away, that’s great! and I like the way you lined up your trucks, now let me see you put the balls in the box where they belong.”

You’re encouraging steps in the right direction. One little boy was learning to dress himself and Mom had a rule that he needed to be dressed before coming to the breakfast table. When he came downstairs with his shirt on backwards and his shoes missing, she still praised him. He was [...]

An Action Point is the point when you stop talking and start acting or the point when children know you mean business. How do they know? You give them cues and your children know what those cues are. If you’re saying the same thing over and over again, how does your child know when the Action Point is near?

Think back on your own childhood. How did you know when your dad or mom meant business? They might have gotten out of the chair or started moving toward you or given you that look. Maybe they used your middle name or started moving toward the kitchen where that special utensil was kept.

For many parents, angry words or a harsh tone of voice become the cue children look for. Unfortunately, this harshness creates distance in the relationship. Look for ways to tighten your Action Point without anger.

Harshness isn’t necessary but firmness is. Firmness with [...]

    Back to top